As soon as the night gets darker than usual, I can get very sleepy. There are some nights I find a lot of sweat around my forehead. Some nights I sleep and get up with nice feelings. I don’t know if there is something wrong within me. But my nightmares aren’t about ghosts, devil or anything. They are always about school and studies. Oh, why are they my nightmares?? The reality is that I dread of going back to my 12-grade class (high school) and going back to meeting my English tutor. I can’t remember how many I have dreamt of going back to school. I always get up exhausted and scared. I hope I won’t bring this with me till I grow up.
A few nights ago, I dreamt about being in my English tutor’s class. I was fighting between the reality and the dream. I no longer wanted to be in his class, even though I was always his favourite student or even best student, as he claimed.
Why did I dread? What made me afraid of dreaming about that? A student who liked their her teacher should have valued such a dream! But why not me? I figured that out and found a few right reasons why I was even afraid of dreaming about him and his class. He has changed a lot. A great teacher I used to idolize has changed unbelieveably. Or have I myself changed?
My inner self tells me that though I’m maturing, my life principles have always been the same. Do you believe that money can change one person to become a completely different person? I am not sure. I am not in his shoes so I don’t know what else he has gone through in our absence.